Self Love Reboot

Self Love Reboot

Whether or not you’re into celebrating Valentine’s Day and all that comes with it, we want to make sure you’re getting a dose of your own affection. At first, it may sound cliché, but self-love is at the foundation of greater well-being.


As we dote on those we adore this Valentine’s holiday, let’s give ourselves a little dose of love too. Expressing compassion and love toward others can often feel more natural than caring for yourself. But think about how it might feel if you had your own back—the way you do for your closest friend, colleague, or partner—and imagine the shift that could bring. Self-love provides greater stability in navigating life’s ups-and-downs with more ease. It gives us the confidence to try to new things and take risks because we know we are enough, despite outcomes of success or failure. It enables us to receive love, deepen our relationships with others, and live a more abundant life.


What is self-compassion?

In a nutshell, self-compassion means caring for yourself as you would another. It’s the act of supporting yourself through challenges, failures, and setbacks with unconditional love. It’s accepting yourself entirely (the good, the bad, and the ugly) and where you are on your current path. Acceptance can be difficult, but it’s often the resistance to accepting a situation, a circumstance, or an attribute that brings about negative thoughts or feelings. Overcoming our imperfections and flaws exudes true beauty.


Self-love practices

Self-compassion takes practice, but the benefits are worth it. While we’re not pretending to be experts at this by any means, we certainly stand behind the notion of welcoming more positivity and self-growth. We’ve compiled some tips to help us all exercise greater self-love.


Try these tips to spread more warmth and kindness to yourself:


1.    Be aware of your internal dialogue. You know it, that internal voice that’s eager to criticize every wrong move, ultimately leading you to feel unworthy and insecure. Could you imagine talking to a friend the same way you talk to yourself when failure strikes? While you may find this voice motivating and think without it that you would be unproductive, it’s important to remember that self-compassion does not mean self-indulgence (or self-pity, or having a big ego). It doesn’t mean letting yourself off the hook for everything because you deserve it all; rather it is reframing your thoughts to observe without judgment and speak to yourself with kindness. Since our inner voice guides our thoughts, and thoughts influence our actions, self-talk has a big impact on what becomes our reality. So the next time your negative internal voice creeps up, acknowledge it—then tell it to F off and choose again.  


2.    Practice self-care. Taking time to recharge your own batteries allows you to put your best self forward. Whatever it is that brings you joy and ignites your fire—hot baths, long walks, meditation, aromatherapy, reading, cooking, journaling, or feeding your creativity—prioritize incorporating these activities into your week. You may need to actually write it in your calendar (if you don’t, no one else will!). Self-care also means caring for your body and mind; adequate sleep, eating nourishing foods, and getting regular physical exercise are all ways you can show care for yourself on a daily basis.


3.    Disconnect (step away from the ‘gram!). Put down your electronic devices and simply be present in the moment. Some find it helpful to schedule specific times during the day to respond to personal emails and check social media. Sure, social media can be an endless source of inspiration, but not at the cost of missing out on what’s happening in your own life. It often leads to comparison, which is a joy thief. Moderation, friends!


4.    Keep a sense of humor and have some fun. This goes without saying, right? Maintaining a sense of humor keeps us grounded, and can quickly shift our mindset, elevating our mood. Sometimes a good belly laugh is all you need for a reset. Spend time with those who you make you laugh and feel good.    


Love is ever-present within and around us. The act of self-care just helps us see it more clearly.


Blogpost written by Ascend content expert Ashley Hart.